Human Branding!

Branding sure has come of age, in India. Forget whether we have learnt the intricacies of it. Ignore if we have become adept in executing it. Never mind if we have or not mastered the art of it in its highest form. Yet, we have reached the supreme form of branding - branding humans!

I am talking about body shopping! No, am not referring to Naidu Hall, but am talking about the IPL auction. That was human branding at its very best. People buying and selling humans – cricketers they may be, but humans – as if they were packaged goods.

Hello branding!

Amazing, the circus that happened last weekend and sadly I didn’t watch it on TV and caught up with it only through the newspapers. Boy, what an exhibition of brands, branding, buying, selling, pricing, value offers and more. Here are a few things that stood out to me in that brand bazaar.

There were brands that were bought for its sheer badge value. Never mind if the brand was worth it in the first place. Yuvraj Singh for $1.8 million was a joke. I mean he is (was!) a good cricketer and all that but that man has a serious attitude problem. Probably he was paid more for his attitude than for his acumen. Then there was Irfan Pathan going for $1.9 million. Delhi Dare Devils has paid the price of BMW for a Nano!

And there were brands that have gone on SALE. I mean, take the sad case of Michael Hussey – Mr. Cricket to those who know him and I am one too – and he has been sold for a mere $425,000. Contrast that with Robin Uthappa – who went for $2.1 million. Atrocious! The other SALE item was Shaun Marsh – a delicate, dashing and dangerous opening batsman - who was bought by Kings XI for a mere $400,000. That’s Aadi thallupidi to me! And guys; watch out for a guy called Clint McKay bought by Mumbai Indians for a laughable $110,000.

There were a few lessons for consumers in this auction. Never spend mountains of money on one or two players. Kolkata Knight Riders has spent close to $4.5 million on just two – Gautam Gambhir and Yusuf Pathan. One injury, one bad season or a few wrong umpiring decisions and the game is over for KKR. Along with it their season’s hopes! The proverbial don’t-put-all-your-eggs-in-one-basket works everywhere. But luckily for KKR, they have had a few big-ticket items at small prices. Brad Haddin at $325,000 was a damn steal.

Contrast that with the approach of Chennai Super Kings. CSK spent $8.6 million on 18 players! They have not paid exorbitantly to any one individual – minus Dhoni and Raina - yet have managed to pick up strong utility players who can collectively win matches for them. To me, what works for CSK is their belief in building a core team – that plays together for years so they could spend time together, build a bond and play as a team. It’s the only team that pretty much looks the same as the previous years’. That to me is a big plus. Other teams are going to take time to build camaraderie and spirit, but by the time they do it, if they manage to do it all, IPL 4 would be over! CSK has got it bang on: Build a core team Nurture a cohesive culture. And watch productivity soar. Smart HR policy at work!

If there is one other thing that stood out to me – that looked different from the principles of branding – it is the absolute lack of emotion in purchases. Brands are largely bought by the heart and rarely by the head. In contrast, this IPL was bereft of emotion. Royal Challengers weren’t carried away by Rahul Dravid and he was instead carried away by Rajasthan Royals at less than half his base price. The delectable Laxman was not picked by his own hometown. And Ganguly lost his place and pride. Rationality ruled; emotion expired!

Will all these brands – bought and sold - deliver? Therein lies another big lesson for marketers. Perform, and watch your professional fee pump up. Saurabh Tiwary’s base price was a mere $40,000 in 2008; his current pick-up price is $1.6 million. R. Ashwin’s base price two years ago was $30,000 and his current selling price is $850,000. Under promise and over deliver and the consumer would not only hold your brand to dear life, but will even allow you to pick the price you want from his or her pocket!

As an aside: Ironically, this is my 100th post. Glad I have scored a century even if I had taken four long years to score it. Guess I have played like Rahul Dravid! I know I lack his flair; I have not played by the book like he does. And importantly, I lack his divine grace, incredible amount of concentration and unbelievable levels of determination. Yet, in my own way, I have managed to score a century! And that I know is only because of you.

Thank you, my friend, for reading!

New Year Resolutions

It’s that time of the year again.

The beginning of a new one; a new dawn; a new phase of life; an whole new start………and all other such nonsense!

To me, personally, the fun part of New Year has always been watching people make resolutions. “I will start doing this.” “I will stop doing this.” And what not. Do they seriously mean them? Absolutely. Will they follow them religiously? Absolutely………..not!

I just don’t believe in New Year Resolutions. Not because I don’t have anything to drop, add or delete. But because of my inability to live up to them or execute them. When it comes to New Year Resolutions, I have always had just one: To never have one!

Since I am not going to have one myself, I thought I would do the next best thing - help give a few resolutions for others to follow; to who else but to my own fraternity. Here are a few New Year resolutions to all the marketers and advertisers – present, past and future - that they can adopt for the so-called New Year.

1. I shall not blindly use a celebrity to advertise my brand. I would rather build a brand that becomes a celebrated entity in its own right.

2. I shall not resort to stupid brand extensions and would rather strive to make my brand stand for the generic like Google, FedEx, Bisleri etc.

3. If I am selling a brand to men, I shall not position it on ‘Sexual Attraction’ like Axe, Set Wet, Wild Stone and a million other brands. Agreed, most men have only one thing in the mind. Yet, I will try and discover new insights to base my brand positioning on.

4. I shall not resort to cheap ‘Sale’, stupid ‘Price-offs’ and unintelligent ‘Offers’ to promote my brand and would rather try and build a brand on old-fashioned marketing values like consumer understanding, spotting need gaps, product innovation etc.,

5. I shall not think that the best way to promote my brand is to sponsor the most popular programme or event without ascertaining the level of fit between the sponsored event / programme and my brand like is the case with the stupid Fair & Lovely Fourth Umpire and brainless Airtel Super Singer. I shall explore better ideas like Britannia 50-50 sponsoring the Third Umpire decision.


Do I seriously believe the marketers would do any of these? Not even in my wildest dreams. But what the hell; it always feels good to give New Year Resolutions to others. When they fail, and believe me, they will, I can always make it the topic for my next blog post!

Does it mean my next post would be on December 31st 2011?