Fast girls. Fast times. Fastrack.

I have a problem.

It all started with Fastrack; more with their latest ads. I saw two of them in the recent past. One, where a girl wakes up one morning from God-knows-where having spent the night with devil-knows-whom and wears her stuff on the way to who-knows-to-who-else!

And there is this other ad where a girl’s hand can’t but park itself on the wrong end of men’s spine!

I am not here to hold the moral candle and rant about the degrading standards of probity or the deplorable dilution of chastity among youth. No Sir. That’s not a subject I prefer to discuss in public; my views on the same notwithstanding.

Nor am I going to write about the falling standards of advertising and its blatant attempt at using sex and nocturnal overtones to titillate the viewers and arouse their interest in the brand; among arousing other things! This is a subject matter of another discussion. Though, I do recall having written about this in one of my previous columns.

This piece is about the advertising strategy of Fastrack. This is about the brand personality as has been portrayed in its advertising. This is about my views on the same; and my wish to get your comments on it as well.

Agreed there are quite a few flirtatious, frivolous and fun-seeking girls who are extremely promiscuous, highly inflammable, perennially resorting to offshore drilling and possessing a flesh fetish that would put a hyena to shame!

Agreed there might be a frightening few who, shall we say, take a more horizontal view of life, seeking the pleasure of vertical limits!

Agreed it is becoming more common nowadays to see a few girls who pledge their chastity and put their probity on ‘Aadi sale’ and not feel too worked up about it.

My point is this. Would a girl like to be seen that way by others? Would she care less about how others view her? Would she say ‘Yes, I am laying my cards on the table (pun intended) and yes I am a girl of low virtue and lower standards?

Wouldn’t a girl mind being termed that way in public even if she is one in private?

I believe a girl might want to have fun but not be in the spotlight for that reason. I think a girl might screw around but not have her name screwed for that reason.

By presenting the positioning in this manner, isn’t Fastrack telling its customers, ‘if you are that kind of a girl here is your opportunity to flaunt who you are’?

By portraying that personality, isn’t Fastrack telling the user, ‘hey, you are like this and go tell the world you are like that’?

Don’t consumers buy the brand’s image and advertising more than buying the brand? Isn’t the physical buying of the brand just a reflection of their having bought into the brand’s image? Aren’t image brands the badges customers wear on their selves to tell the world who they are?

When one wear a Nike, isn’t he trying to tell the world he has an attitude?

When one drives a Pulsar, isn’t he revealing to everyone he is stylish?

When one drinks Mountain Dew, isn’t he communicating to all and sundry that he is adventurous?

Isn’t this what branding all about?

If so…………..by wearing Fastrack wouldn’t a girl be telling the world she is frivolous, fun-loving and flirtatious? Wouldn’t she be telling the guys she can be outsourced? Wouldn’t she also be saying she is an FMCG product – Fast Moving Carefree Girl!

Maybe, I should go ask a few girls what they think about this piece. Maybe, I should pose these questions to a few girls who wear Fastrack.

If they take offense and fight, well that I can manage. But what if they construe it as an invite, and even worse accept?

You see, that’s my problem!